Silver Linings

2 Aug
Yesterday, I posted about the effects of Sequestration. Its a real thing. Its hurting the military ranks. It is also being used as a cop-out, and I am dealing with that aspect of it this week. I am angry- no furious- and frustrated. However, after ranting as much as I am able, and knowing that my ranting will get me nothing more than a headache, while giving everyone around me the impression that I am a hot-head – of course, how would they know anything different, when the first time they deal with me is over their own incompetence? SIGH
And there I go again. I am still HOT about the situation, the “reasons,” the excuses. Completely let down. Once again, having the military slam it in my face that my family does not matter is a hard pill to swallow. Granted, a bunch of incredible spouses have commiserated, have jumped up and gotten answers for me, and have offered a helping hand. For them I am INCREDIBLY thankful. Yet, no amount of kindness from spouses who can nothing more than exactly that can erase the neglect and disdain from the people who are supposed to also be caring for the families- the leadership.
And again… I am completely forgetting WHY I sat down to write this post this morning. Obviously, I need to step back. In prayer this morning, I am trying to let it go. I am trying to turn my gaze away from the frustration. As I laid in bed, with the sunrise streaming through the window, and the cool breeze touching my face, and the birdsong filtering through, I realized I NEED to again call on my practice to count my blessings. There are so VERY many of them.
I firmly believe the way my day turns out starts first thing in the morning when I CHOOSE- yes, you read that right- when I CHOOSE to be positive or I CHOOSE to be negative. Yesterday, I allowed the ugly side of the day to get to me, and I chose to cling to that instead of choosing to say my piece and let it go. I CHOSE to get worked up about it. See, there is a difference between having feelings- like my hurt and frustration and anger- and allowing those feelings to control you. Yesterday, I let those feelings control me. And I feel guilt over my words. I threw an adult tantrum. No matter whether I was right or wrong, the way I went about sharing my concerns has likely taped a HUGE label on my forehead. So, today, I CHOOSE to force myself to step away. I CHOOSE to mentally slap myself out of it, and see those silver linings.
 First- we live in a place where we actually get rain. Granted, I think we happened to move here in time for the rainy season, but still. We have gotten more rain during the short time that we have lived here, than we have gotten in the past year in San Angelo. And the thunder and the lightening! I tell you what- WOW! I have always loved the raw power of a thunderstorm, and we have seen it several times now since moving here.

Of course, after every afternoon shower or storm, we are blessed with reminders of the silver lining. Reminders of a power that will care for us no matter how people let us down. I have seen this daily reminder of God’s promise at least every other day since moving here. I don’t think I even saw this many rainbows when we lived in Hawaii! Its incredible!

San Angelo sunsets will never be beat in my opinion. I have seen sunsets on the beaches of Florida. I have seen sunsets from the Appalachians. I have seen sunsets in Hawaii. Now, I have seen sunsets in the Rockies. Of course, each sunset is unique and beautiful. There is no denying that. And while these sunsets over the mountains still take my breath away, and cause my heart to flutter, I still think San Angelo sunsets with their brilliant shades of purples, pinks, and blues are my favorite. And yet, I am consistently drawn to watch the sun set over the mountains every evening.

Ah… The silver linings that actually keep me grounded. My guys. What would I do without them? Both of them had to listen to me rant and rave yesterday. On one side, DH completely agrees. We are definitely in agreement over the disappointment we feel over the situation. However, while I was raring to go jumping up and down on someone’s desk, he had already taken a much more calmer stance. After all, and he is right, what will that do? Nothing. So, DH listened, offered his agreements and disagreements, and allowed me to vent, vent, vent. By the time I was done, frankly, I was a bit ashamed of myself, at which point, he knew to simply hug me and be supportive and let the matter drop. — Now — the Kiddo… He knows the best way to diffuse Mama Bear is to love on her. Hug her, kiss her, cuddle with her. Throw endless amounts of affection at this Mama and she melts right away. And who doesn’t love that?

I know today is a brand new day. While it does not erase yesterday, the problems from yesterday seem much smaller today. Today is fresh, and bright, and new. I have the promise of a God who loves me, of a DH who stands by me, and a Kiddo who is tender and affectionate. I am in a new, beautiful place surrounded with proof of His Majesty and Power. I am in a new place with new people to meet and befriend and develop relationships with. Today is a great day to CHOOSE to be different than I was yesterday.

To see more of those things that take my breath away, visit my photo page “Where We Live.”

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